Why? Because I can. Also, just read a list that was wrong on every conceivable level. Goddamn.
(Yes, this blog is for more than just me bitching about politics and religion. Sunglasses! For some reason!)
25 - Every movie that has ever featured a pair of Wayfarers. Because that while that shit is entirely played-out and I never want to see a pair ever again, they are, grudgingly, classics. Now fuck off and move on.
24 - Men in Black (Ray Ban Predator) - Will Smith's character said it best; "You know the difference between you and me? I make this look good."
23 - Terminator (Gargoyle ANSI Classics) - Surprisingly fashion-forward for an 80s action movie featuring the future-Governator, these can still be pulled off today, though whether that's a testament to classic status or history repeating itself, I can't say.
22 - Mission Impossible 2 (Oakley Romeo) - Back before I hit puberty I thought Oakley was the greatest thing ever, and with the Romeo being the top-of-the-line, these were the pinnacle of engineering and fashion and pure sexy superness. Now that my balls have left my abdomen, I prefer sunglasses that don't look like prizes from a box of Cheerios, but these still hold a nostalgic place in my heart. Bonus: They're bigger than Tom Cruise's face, which is endlessly amusing. It looks like his head's been attacked by a Geiger-esque rodent.
21 - Rock n' Rolla (Cazal 856) - I've said it before and I'll surely say it again, Cazal sunglasses seem to only ever be worn by drug users, drug dealers, or musicians. The character who wears them is a drug-addicted rock star. Hypotheses confirmed.
20 - Mr. and Mrs. Smith (Oliver Peoples Victory) - This movie, along with Burn Notice, have made the OP Victory (55mm lenses, not the more recent 58mm) one of the most sought-after and popular aviators of the past decade. Thanks, popular culture, for ensuring I have to pay out the ass to get a pair.
19 - Terminator 2 - (Persol 58230) - Speaking of popular culture making shit far too expensive, say hello to one of the most popular frames ever produced by the legendary Ratti factory in Italy. To be sure, you should have to pay a lot to look this good. Shame about the Liquid Cop breaking them, though.
18 - Collateral (Custom Silhouette) - Want to make a sociopathic hitman even scarier? Give him impenetrable black-lensed sunglasses that can be worn whenever eye contact would reveal too much. That they're one-offs made specifically for Cruise makes 'em that much cooler.
17 - Pitch Black (Riddick's goggles) - Contrary to popular belief, the goggles DO something, but only if you're a mass-murdering brick-person with anger issues.
16 - Zombieland - (ic! berlin Maja) - Yes, I know, they get about 3 seconds of screen time - according to the commentary, Woody wanted to wear them throughout but the director convinced him otherwise - but what an awesome 3 seconds. A perfect introduction to a character as badass as the shades he sports. And then discards. Oh well.
15 - The Thomas Crowne Affair (Persol 714 with custom blue lenses) - There's a reason Steve McQueen is considered a style icon even today: because his glasses kicked fucking ass. Worn both on-screen and off, the Persol 714s were considered his "trademark" shades, forever to be associated with the man for whom cool came effortlessly.
14 - Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory (Custom-crafted goggle... things) - Call me crazy, but I prefer Tim Burton's version, thanks in no small part to Johhny Depp's completely cracked-out portrayal of an intensely creepy man, Willy Wonka. His borderline contempt for the children, coupled with his outlandish wardrobe - including the goggle-shades to end all goggle-shades - ensure him a place on this list.
13 - The Matrix: Reloaded/Revolution (Smith's and Neo's customs by Blinde) - Yeah, the movies don't hold up all that well, but the shades do. Smith's are actually rather interesting, in that they're an edgier, more angular version of Neo's shades from the original. I think that's an attempt at subtext. Or supertext. Whatever, they're cool.
12 - The Matrix (Morpheus' pince nez by Blinde) - Likely the first time anyone in the audience - under the age of 30, anyway - had been exposed to a pince nez. What's that, a sunglass without arms? That's like a car with no wheels! Notable for making a large, intimidating man seem that much larger and intimidatier.
11 - Game of Death (Whatever it is non-Bruce wears) - The only reason non-Bruce wore these gigantic-ass shades was to hide the fact that looked nothing like the real Bruce Lee, who had died after filming all the fight scenes. Or, an alternate interpretation is that the sunglasses are meant to hold back Bruce Lee's true power, which is why he only ever takes them off to fight. I guess that's kinda badass.
10 - The Big Lebowski - (Ray Ban Shooter) - Omni-present sunglasses had better be badass, and luckily, these are. They make the already-unhinged Walter Sobchak seem that much closer to the brink; these were, after all, made popular in the early days of competitive shooting, and Walter is known for flashing his piece around the bowling alley.
9 - Iron Man (Oliver Peoples Corsair) - Another model with very little screen time, but damn, does it ever earn its place. Custom red lenses make the gold frames pop - and hint at the origin of the color scheme for Tony's suit - and the single-bridge aviator style ensures they look current, yet timeless. It's a tricky balancing act.
8 - Quantum of Solace (Oliver Peoples Airman) - I don't care if it's officially a Tom Ford product; the style's an *exact* copy of the Airman, hence, credit goes to Oliver Peoples. Anyway, this is another single-bridge aviator which, while unisex, looks perfect on Bond and gives him an air of both intrigue, with a hint of I-will-strand-your-ass-in-a-desert-if-you-kill-my-conquest.
7 - Scarface (Linda Farrow 6031) - OK, so they only appear in one scene, but damn if they don't make an impression. In an era, and movie, where conspicuous consumption was a virtue, these nearly sate Tony's inner glutton. The mountains of coke probably didn't hurt, either.
6 - Zoolander - (The whole freakin' movie) - You could probably do an entire feature on just this movie. But as I'm far too lazy for that, you get this recommendation to watch it for yourself. Enjoy.
5 - Ocean's Eleven (Oliver Peoples Whistle) - Y'know, I didn't understand the appeal of Sex and the City until a friend pointed out that my love of the Ocean's series is based on much the same thing: material lust. I would argue that there's also far less vapidity and that the Ocean's movies didn't set gender relations back 50 years, but that's just me. Oh, yeah, and the Whistle is Brad Pitt's frame of choice. Dude has taste.
4 - Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas (Ray Ban Shooter) - I know, they're already on this list. I don't care. They're awesome.
3 - Miami Vice (Robert Marc 710, Sama Slam) Dress to impress! And intimidate! These two styles are simple, but ooze class and superior workmanship. If only more designers would take their heads out of their asses and realize that you don't need flashy logos when you have a well-executed product.
2 - Casino (Ultra Goliath 2 and Cazal 951) - The two best pairs of many in the best mob movie ever made? Hell yes. Bonus: Cazal hypotheses confirmed yet again; they're worn by Lester Diamond, who is, among other things, a coke fiend.
1) Fight Club (OP-523, Sunset, and Aero 54) - The holy trinity of badass movie shades, all worn by the man that every dude in North America wants to be. Oliver Peoples, take a bow.
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